God How Could You

It must have been a rainy day for the the Lord that he might have killed a person I loved with such a cruel weapon as drugs. I’ve searched the stars for answers and have found none. So I turn to the black in me which is the pain of seeing someone I love try and kill themselves.

I have no answers. I am lost in saddness. I pray that all holy in me survives this. That everything soft won’t die. I love to love. For it heals the soul. My soul though now is so broken.

Please forgive me loved ones for loving such another broken thing. I have loved all that the Lord has blessed me with. I shall discover in me the sorrow which ventures out to rest. For the night has been so long watching one of God’s creations suffer so mightily.

I thank all who read these words. I rest alone thinking what have I done? How could my love not be enough to resuscitate the dieing ember which was a beautiful soul? Now she wants to die.

My love, my heart if you only knew the power you had on my soul. That I would tear out the stars in the night for you. My dear love we shall meet again.

6 Comments Add yours

  1. kristianw84 says:

    I am very sorry for your loss and pain, Jared. I can only imagine. I’m sending you lots of warm thoughts, hugs, and love. I hope you feel them. ❤

    You are a beautiful soul who knows pain, of course you love the broken and deeply wounded. Don’t ever apologize for loving such things and people, the world needs more of that.

    The soft things never die. They might harden for a while, but the softness is there, you just have to look for it.

    Love and hugs, my friend.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. J.Michael says:

      Thank you for your kind words Kristian.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Secret Bree says:

    Oh Jared, this is incredibly difficult and I can’t imagine how you are processing it all. I think the words you have written here are powerful and we stand witness to your pain and love for others. Be kind to yourself J-bird (don’t be too hard on yourself). Sending you lots of WP love.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. J.Michael says:

      Thanks for the words of comfort Bree.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. This is touching. So sorry for your loss. Be consoles.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. J.Michael says:

      Thank you Florence. 😁


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